Our Breakfast Club

Opportunism

bjfrazier — Tue, 05 Aug 2008 22:36:00 +0000

While sitting on the deck of our compact beach cottage in South Kingstown, RI, a neighbor power walked by, one of many “walkers” this sunny Tuesday morning. This particular fellow is well known in the area. Talk about a model of relationship building. This guy has something wonderful to say to absolutely everybody he encounters along his 4+ mile workout. Whether it’s a passing motorist, cyclist, another walker, a neighbor like me (just hanging out)…whoever, whatever, he bellows out some form of kindness and hope…a good wish, good news, or just a gigantically happy “Hello, have a great day!”…and you just know he means it.

This morning was a different scene. As he passed me so too a motorist who was passing him slowed down to talk. He suddenly looked troubled. I couldn’t make out her words, but I clearly heard him. “I know, I know” he almost moaned. Then, “Oh yes, I know several people who are really hurting. They are having trouble keeping things together and they don’t know what they’re going to do”. She responded, and, as if he had enough, he started up again closing with…”yes, I’ll keep you in mind”.…”15 years you’ve been doing this…”Sure, I’ll tell them”… achieving his pace again.

Opportunism. She knows who the “eyes and ears” of the neighborhood is, so right there in the middle of the road she’s promoting whatever she does for people in economic pain. In taking all this in, I thought long and hard about opportunism and business relationships.

How many of you, like me, see more and more examples of “ambulance chasing” in today’s market? (Term made famous in legal services to describe the lawyer that follows the ambulance in hopes of a lawsuit opportunity.) I am noticing what I call “born again” entrepreneurs looking to make deals from every iteration of economic or personal distress.

Opportunism. Why is it a powerful relationship maker? Why do we not abandon helping colleagues and clients through rough times? Why is it that when more of us do better, the better we all do… and when someone helps you through pain you never forget them?

July 10 Our Breakfast Club Meeting: Theme: Perseverance

bjfrazier — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 12:19:29 +0000

Each of Our Breakfast Club meetings has a theme. The theme for July was “perseverance” because the word is commonly used to mean “to not give up” or “to keep trying”… attributes associated with building long term business relationships. However, looking at the full, correct meaning of the word, we find an unexpected lesson about word use and relationship building.

For those of you who don’t know, the origin of “perseverance” is the obsolete Latin verb severo, meaning “stick to rigidly”. (The lesser known derivative word “asseverate” means to stick rigidly to what you say, in contrast to the more common “persevere” which refers to sticking rigidly to what you do or undertake.) So as it turns out “perseverance” is a double edged sword.

It is essential to “stick to” a system, strategy, or plan to develop relationships with people who can help you grow your business. But, without a doubt, sticking rigidly to your plan will be counterproductive. Why? Well one reason is the golden rule of relationship building: “First, give help”. That means listening to the other person, and responding based on what they tell you is their need, not what you believe it to be. If you are rigidly focused on your “wants” and not on the other persons “needs” it is likely you’ll miss an important relationship building opportunity.

Have you experienced this lesson and how did you handle it?

Welcome

bjfrazier — Sun, 13 Jul 2008 17:49:13 +0000

We are the Breakfast Club, a fast-growing group of business professionals who get together to share business tips, leads, contacts and information and have a good time too!